Happy Japanniversary to me! Five years ago, exactly six months after mommy’s transition, I was offered a position as a military teacher. Stricken with grief and hopelessness, I accepted the job without a second thought. Best decision ever! I love Japan and most of all, I love teaching. Mama always wanted to travel but never had the opportunity so it’s cool that I get to live out her dream. I miss mama and know she would be so proud of me. I miss her magnanimous soul, infectious laughter, and gentle touch. I miss being able to call her just to tell her how much I love her or to simply ask for prayer when I feel a little blue. There’s not a day that goes by that her memory doesn’t cross my mind. She’s my reason for being and believing that there is a God somewhere. I don’t mention that simply because she was my mother. Reflecting upon her life, the many selfless acts I experienced and witnessed, to understanding how kind, forgiving, and loving she was, I know that God blessed whomever she encountered on borrowed time.
Like Coltrane’s, “Giant Steps” the beginning of my existence is just as complex, melodic, and challenging. Daddy told me that he was a “dog” in his olden days. He cheated on mama numerous times, having several affairs resulting in extramarital children including me. I was born to a drug fiend and daddy hid my existence from his then-wife for six weeks until he could no longer. He’d attempted to visit me only to discover that I was left home alone, laying in a pile of shit and screaming to the top of my little lungs. That day, he broke into the home and rushed me to the hospital. He was almost arrested for child neglect but explained that I was abandoned by my biological mother who had an addiction at the time. Once released, he took me to his wife, asking her to care for me. Without hesitation, she instantly became my mother and has been the only mother I've ever known.
Interestingly, her mother was adopted, her mother adopted her, and mama adopted me making me the third generation adoptee. Amazing, right? Although I've met and know my biological mother, she and no one can fill that void or replace the immeasurable love mama gave me. If I could become half the woman she was, I’d be something! I can’t imagine the hurt and turmoil daddy caused her throughout their marriage. Nevertheless, she showed so much grace and strength up until her death. Most of all, she showed love, compassion, and forgiveness. I shared all of this to remind you to cherish the beautiful souls in your life. Often times we take the most precious beings for granted because we think we have time. We think they’ll always be there. We become consumed with ourselves, not realizing that every second spent (or not) is valuable and could be our last. Dear God, I want and miss my mama so!
Missing Ro,
Ro’s Little Lady
Happy Japanniversary to me! Five years ago, my life changed as I landed in Japan for the first time. I’m forever grateful for my journey and all the beautiful people I’ve encountered, the goddaughter I gained, friends turned family, growing pains, and lessons gained. Japan has been good to me. Cheers to many more years!